Traccidents

Melbourne, Victoria

Australia

When my friend Brona told me she was late because her tram was in an accident, I’ll admit it now, I didn’t buy it.

When my tram collided with a turning cop car, I was surprised. I wonder who felt more stupid, the tram driver that didn’t see the cop, or the cop that didn’t see the tram.

But when my tram crashed into a car sitting on the tracks, sending everyone forward to the front wall like flies hitting the windshield, I was downright shocked. As, I imagine, was the eighty-year-old man whose lap I landed in. Not only did I land in likely someone’s grandfather’s lap, but another man, lets call him in his sixties, came flying at me, cushioning the impact with his elbow to my face. My face lost, in case you were wondering.

Whether it be at the Sloaney Pony or on public transport, old men are now figuratively and literally throwing themselves at me.